You Can Fuck Me Now

Vaccination #2 is in the books!

Ok! All my female fans who find me irresistible (hey, mom)! I am effectively billed out and bound to go (old blues reference). Y’all can fuck me now! I’m good to go.

Let me be serious for a millisecond. While vaccination #1 went smoothly down at my local Walgreens, the reprise turned out to be a nightmare. As you may or may not know, Walgreen’s stock is in the toilet because it’s a poorly-run chain — and everybody on Wall Street (and Main Street) knows it. Vaccination date #2 assured me that their reputation is well-deserved.

Though I had a noon appointment for my second shot, it was clear that the process was going to take hours. The line to sign in weaved through several aisles — and resembled a cue to buy Springsteen tickets more than a line for a vaccination. And I wasn’t having it!

Just then, a strident old bitty who I recognized from vax day #1, chimed in to my irritation. And that was it. I walked. Fuck Walgreens.

So I went home to book an appointment elsewhere knowing that shot #1 and #2 are identical with the Moderna vaccine. But it wasn’t all that simple. Since my first shot, the field had been open to all adults — not just geezers like me over 65 years of age.

Still, I managed to find a Rite Aid with a slot two weeks later. Come April 15th, the weather couldn't have been worse. I got totally soaked on the way there. But the line was short owing to the weather (I assume) and the backlash from the J & J vax killing somebody.

But there were a couple of glitches. Not many people get their two shots at different pharmacies. So there was that — which required an ok from management who was summoned with an “urgent request” over the loudspeaker.

And then there was the girl who gave me the shot. Not ready for prime time, apparently. She missed the first time and had to grab another dose with the admonition “don't move.”

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