Elusive

A poem

We sat on our familiar seats in total silence
each avenue explored had closed in
and in the dropping of a pin we jumped
startled to realize that our chance had flown by

Elusive lines and too many rich wines
marred the marble surface in crazed lines
when I polished it I admit it just looked worse
as if my touch was indeed Midas in reverse

But no, there is more to it than thin veneer
I hear our hearts beating and the air is dense
emotions like floods in wild winters overwhelm us
and the elusive gestures get lost in translation

What is love in the time of these plagues?
clinging to each other and then in rage
walking away from the heated scene or
is it just me? I have time to ask why or how
did it come to this time and time again..

I reach and strain to hit the right note
but most often I hover around it slightly off key
even this harmony is so damned elusive
she sang, I recalled, like a songbird sings
conscious only of the pleasure it brings to all

My fever has kicked in and it seems my blood
is too hot to be contained within my generous frame
it was always this way with the men in my tribe
bombastic cowards or just trying to hard to be loved
it is for the angels above to bless me now

For in my sin the silt has settled and the water is clear
revealing the jagged rocks of my deepest fears
She soothed me constantly yet even the embrace
was elusive and my hardened carapace repelled

So it seems the plagues continue until all are afflicted
the savage sweep of anxiety and doubt takes it toll
I am out of energy and even the desire has faded
like a jaded Emperor now I sit and watch her sing
my caged nightingale flitting in her steel wire jail
always desperately yearning to be free.

Chris Papps

2022

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